An Escape

These past few months have been absolutely nerve-wracking and stressful, and with each passing week, things get worse and I wonder what I was thinking about when I thought the previous week was stressful.

I almost don’t feel like going on holiday, cos I wonder what I’ll come back to when I get back to work. But then I’d planned a trip so in advance that I hadn’t anticipated the amount of work or stress I’d be in at this point in my life. But when I think about it, I have done everything I can do at work, the rest of the decisions that are being made are not in my control… so why not just let it all go and take some time off to unwind, right?

So I’m going. I hope that it will be a good trip, this. I hope that I can forget my worries for a bit and just relax so that that my insides stop feeling like it’s been twisted into knots.

I have never felt more like the jaded adult cliche that so many seem to be so well acquainted with, and I hate it. I’m hoping that travel will cure me of this affliction. Traveling makes me feel young and curious and happy and carefree. Like I can believe in magic again. And I so very badly want to believe!

So I’m going on a break to Spain. To Barcelona and Seville and a bunch of places. By the time you read this, I will hopefully be drinking my weight in sangria and forgetting all about the drudgery of corporate life.


Holi Day

I’m feeling inexplicably nostalgic today about Holi. I love this festival of colours and very badly want to celebrate it this year, but it looks like it’s going to be just another regular day for me.

My first holi in a city that actively celebrated it was in Delhi. Winter had just about started to melt away and spring was in the air (of course, this is a given considering Holi is a celebration of Spring!). I’d recently broken up with my first boyfriend and we were in that delusional phase where we thought we could still be friends. Thankfully, we managed to play along and keep peace that day. My friend and I went over to his house, a sprawling villa that he shared with a bunch of his friends, and we started our war of colours with the neighbours! I don’t remember much of it, but I know it involved a lot of running around and a lot of laughing! I also remember that blue was the dominant colour that day, cos someone thought it’d be fun to use ink (ink!!!) instead of gulal.

Afterwards, we took the bikes and rode out to the Delhi-Gurgaon highway to find a place to eat. We stopped at a dhaba and ordered tandoori roti, chicken kadai, and mattar-paneer all topped with a huge dollop of ghee right before serving. By the way, you can’t avoid paneer if you’re in Delhi. There’ll always be at least one vegetarian in the group who’ll order it in some form or the other. But I digress…

It was a warm day full of sunshine and the food, like all dhaba food, was delicious. We had bottles of Limca spiked with vodka with us which we would sneak mouthfuls of from the bottle. Riding back, I noticed that the entire city was awash in colours, like everyone had been through some kind of rainbow explosion. Everywhere I looked, people had the faces smeared in reds, yellows, pinks and every colour imaginable.

Regrettably, I don’t have any photographs of that day. It was before smartphones and instagrams became the norm and if you wanted pictures, you’d need a film camera. I remember going back to work the next day with my fingernails still stained in red and blue and laughing at colleagues who had tinges of colour in their ears and hair. It would take a while for the colours to be washed off, sure. But the memories… they last a lifetime!