My mum, and her mum, have not had easy lives. I’m not comparing my life with their’s or equating their suffering to mine. Times were different, lives are different, and the paths we come across are different.
My mum and I don’t get along. It’s not that I don’t love her, I do. But there’s always been a lot of tension between us since I went off to college. I wasn’t always very sure of what I wanted (I’m still not, but I am sure of what I don’t want!) and this has conflicted a lot with what my mom wants from me, which created a rift between us that has just increased the older I grew.
But she’s always been Mom. She’s always the person who will take care of me when I’m sick. When I got my shoulder injured last year, I cancelled all my other plans and went back to India, to mom. To eat mom’s cooking, to heal in her care. And though the woman drives me crazy, we also have a great time together whenever we agree on things! :P
My sister, who my mum is extremely close to, left for higher studies to the UK around 3 years ago, and my mum’s been pretty much at a loose-end since, feeling lonely and upset and missing my sis a lot!
But last year, she discovered yoga, got interested in it so much that she took a course to become a certified yoga practitioner, and now… now she’s doing her MSc in Yoga! Yeah! :D
Before she left for uni, she left enough food to last dad the 10 days she’d be gone and ensured that everything would be alright while she was away (she’s a very traditional conscientious wife that way). But dad still missed her presence and was calling her 2-3 times a day anyway (which is so weird! If you knew my dad, you’d know what I meant! He usually claims to be completely self-sufficient! :P)
She’s back now, after a long and exhausting couple of weeks which she seemed to thoroughly enjoy!
Chatting with her usually involves her trying to get me married to someone or the other she’s found on some matrimonial site (yes, I’m on all of them I’m sure! She’s created profiles for me everywhere!) which ends up with us arguing about the same thing again, leaving us both feeling frustrated and depressed!
Today though, it was all about her Uni and the people she met there and the way the students treated her so nicely (the ones she befriended are students around 20-25 years old) and how amazing it all was.
The university she’s in spans about 25 acres and going from the hostel to the canteen is in itself a 15 min walk. And going outside the campus was out of the question as she’d have to walk at least 20-25 mins to get anywhere. This one day, she had a headache and told her friend that she’s going to skip lunch and went to sleep. A while later, this girl comes back with some medicines and a sliver of watermelon, saying that she shouldn’t stay hungry if she had a headache! She’d gone out and bought it all for her!
It gladdens my heart that she’s meeting people from different walks of life, and that they love her and respect her and are actually taking care of her!
But…I do feel slightly… jealous? :o/
I mean, she’s my mom! She’s my mommmm!
But suddenly’s it’s like she’s this whole other person, with a whole new life! A life that I’m absolutely not a part of!
I’m so proud of what she’s doing! And incredibly happy for her, and yet, just a little … I dunno… is jealous the right word if you feel like you’re missing out on something? I’m so used to her just being in the mommy role that I just find it a little disconcerting that she’s got this other life going on now that has nothing to do with the person I know.
Does that make sense?
But that’s just a transient feeling! Cos I’m liking this new person that she is. She’s finally got something to do other than just obsess about my marriage! We’ve got things to talk about now that don’t involve shaadi.com! :P
It’ll be another year before she gets her degree. So that’s a year’s worth of profiles I won’t have to look at! ;o)
Seriously though, I’m thankful that she’s found something that she’s really passionate about, and can only hope that I too will one day, be able to follow my passion as she has!